BTUI (Buying Things Under the Influence)

I kind of decided to buy Boom Blox: Bash Party while tipsy the other night. It turned out to be a great decision as the game is spectacular, but it got me thinking about buying things while drunk or in other altered states.

I've often joked about my list of games that I'm just waiting for a drunk night to go and buy. Currently, this list is two games strong:

• Cho Aniki (A homoerotic TG16 shooter on Virtual Console)


• Pong Toss (that beer pong WiiWare game)

(Random Musing: the lead singer in Coheed and Cambria sounds like Geddy Lee. It's weird.)

Those two games have populated that list since last fall and I've still yet to buy them. It could be that the Wii's interface to buy games (especially with a credit card) requires too much effort for a drunk enough version of me to operate, but maybe I have some restraint. Obviously not enough restraint for a $40 retail game, though. I confuse myself.

I think I would've been more likely to buy things while drunk on Xbox 360 because it saves my credit card info. I probably have bought a few Rock Band songs that way, actually.

I have actually purchased a game on the Wii's Virtual Console while drunk, though. I bought Chew Man Fu while drunk, and that game fucking rocks. It's this weird ball-rolling puzzle game for TG16 that's on the Virtual Console.

I don't really have any more steam for this thought, though. I'm spent.

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Boom Blox: Bash Party is fucking fantastic, though. I really recommend it to anyone with a Wii because it's got got the best multiplayer this side of a Nintendo game. There's so much variety in the gameplay. I'm 20% into the game and already I've gone through five different gameplay mechanics. And there even seems to be advanced versions of each gameplay mechanic as you master the first batch.

The most interesting one thus far is definitely the underwater mechanic. They fuck with the physics and have underwater physics and they require you to throw gems up to the surface before they hit the ground. At first, they're all stationary and it is easy. Soon, there's all sorts of other blocks around and a fucking octopus swatting at your shit. It's fucking intense. There's a space level, too, but I haven't gotten there yet. I'm pumped for it.

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Tomorrow is my fiancee's hyphy party. Should be a good time. I imagine we might ghost ride a whip and listen to some E-40. Perhaps we'll drink hyphy juice. Idk. I just wanna keep it treal.

For now, it is time to debate whether or not to go to bed, or boot up the Wii and play some Boom Blox or try out the Munchables.

Intro, E3, and My DSi

I don't know how long this will last, but I'm going try to reboot this P.O.S. into some sort of game journal with occasional distractions (like my token summer movie musings and such).

Anyone that's a fan of more abstract weird shit, go to the Venkman Suite, which is my community blog with my now fiancee and our two best friends. Its not updated often, but whatever.

If you like reading even more abstract shit, read my fiancee's blog about...well, just read it.

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I went to E3 last week. Words can't really describe how insanely awesome and tiring it was. All I'll do for now is link you to Nintendo World Report's coverage of it, which is insanely robust. I will be contributing to a post-E3 feature soon, so I'll keep you posted on that.

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I've been loving the crap out of my DS lately as I picked up Nintendo's The Legendary Starfy on Sunday and downloaded WayForward's Mighty Flip Champs and Nintendo's Mario vs. DK: Minis March Again. All of them are pretty fantastic. I'm getting near the point where I can write up reviews on MFC and Mario vs. DK, so look for that on NWR soon (I'll try to throw up a link).

I'm really liking Starfy though. It reminds me of an underwater Kirby with better level design. It's pretty simple, but it's got this undeniable charm and surprisingly good sense of humor. It's been kind of a cakewalk, but it's been a wonderful contrast to the difficulty of Mighty Flip Champs. I can't wait to see what other powers Starfy will get and see what other bosses there will be. The bosses are easy, but I love how they terrorize not just one level, but an entire world.

My DS will continue to get love as I await the arrival of Atari's Ghostbusters DS for review.

Although that pesky lil Wii will be getting some love as well thanks to the coming storm of The Munchables, Tiger Woods PGA Tour 10 (hopefully), Let's Tap, Guitar Hero: Smash Hits, and maybe Indiana Jones Wii.

Top 5 Xbox 360 Games of 2008

I work for a Nintendo website, so my Xbox 360 and the games I buy for it are rarely talked about.
That being said, I need some soap box to stand on so I can tell the world my top 5 Xbox 360 games of 2008.

#5 - Prince of Persia

A fucking beautiful game that looks similar to a watercolor painting. I thoroughly enjoyed its 10+ hour adventure and I don't have much to complain about besides the fact that the game plays itself a bit.
The ending is awesome, though.

#4 - Mirror's Edge

I really love this game despite its evident faults, such as questionable combat and frustrating deaths. The single player story, while short, is very enjoyable and brings about a different kind of platforming. The time trials are where the game shines and I eagerly anticipate the DLC at the end of the month.

#3 - Fable II

There's some Sims stuck in my open-world adventure game! The sheer amount of content in this game is astounding regardless of the short main quest (that I still haven't completed but watched my roommate complete). It would easily claim the top spot if it weren't for the amount of repetition and the lame bosses.

#2 - Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts & Bolts

There's some vehicle creation in my platformer! While some might hate on the change of pace in this game, I loved it. With a wealth of different things to do, this game easily sucked me into its crazy world. Rare still has a sense of humor. Yay!

#1 - Left 4 Dead

Party game of the year. Valve once again proves that they are probably the best developers in the world (at least for FPS) by making a zombie-killing with only four levels that are different every time. Easily accesible, lots of challenge. Wonderful.

Game of the Forever: Rock Band 2 - I can't really compare this to any other game. I love Harmonix and I love Rock Band.

Top 3 Downloadable Games (XBox 360)

#3 - Sega Soccer Slam - Best Xbox Original EVAR! (I know Psychonauts is really good...)
#2 - Braid - Fun game, lots of pretention
#1 - Bionic Commando: Rearmed - Beautiful remake of a great game. Multiplayer? Awesome!

Games That Missed the Mark

Fallout 3 - I played this and then realized how much I don't really like Bethesda games. No offense, I respect them for making huge games and all, they're just not my bag.

Grand Theft Auto 4 - All GTAs are the same to me. I really only like fucking around in them. I don't care for the monotonous story.

Review of Fall 2008's Video Games

Hey everybody! This place is barren wasteland due to the whole Nintendo World Report thing but I'm thinking every now and then a boy needs a place where he can curse like a fucking sailor and not focus on his Wii. Because, honestly, this latest season of video games has been a barren wasteland on the Wii. Besides reviewing games, my Wii resides in my Lauren's room so she and Jen can play Harvest Moon. I played some Brawl, Warioware, and Mario Kart last weekend. I played some Wii Sports and Tetris Party with my family over Thanksgiving. I tried Wii Music and got frustrated with how terrible it is and then played Guitar Hero: World Tour on Wii and got equally pissed off. With the exception of the games that have been out for a while (Brawl, MKart, Mario Galaxy...) and the few recent gems (de Blob, Wario Land. I'll be generous and say Mario Super Sluggers), this holiday season has been largely unimpressive.

That being said, I am intrigued by the trio of balance board compatible games that came out a few weeks ago (Skate It, Shaun White Snowboarding, Rayman Raving Rabbids 3) because I need some justification for going to Target at 8 AM and spending $90 on Wii Fit.
Also, I'm crazy excited for the releases slated for next year, such as Mad World, the Conduit, Punch-Out!, Sin and Punishment 2, and the as-yet-unannounced games that have to be coming. I haven't given up on the Wii, not in the least. This fall just kind of blew.

What I have been doing is playing my Xbox 360 like a madman. For the first time since the fucking thing came out, I actually care about all of the big releases and have actually paid attention to the system. This has been a plentiful season for 360.
Since October 21st, I have bought: Fable II, Mirror's Edge, Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts & Bolts, Mortal Kombat vs. DC Universe, Left 4 Dead, and Prince of Persia.
Here's the best part: I haven't been let down with one of them. I would recommend all of those games to anybody. Fable II is a great, lengthy, humorous open-world RPG. Mirror's Edge is an inventive, genre-bending experience. Banjo-Kazooie is a gorgeous vehicular re-imaging of a fun Mario 64 rip-off. MK vs DC is, well, the weak link of the group, but its got a bunch of comic book characters fighting ninjas. Left 4 Dead is probably the best thing to ever happen to FPS for me, and maybe the best party game of the year. Prince of Persia is a beautiful piece of art with Shadow of the Colossus undertones.

It's been a fucking sweet season for 360.

"Shit, July's Almost Over" or Review of the Summer Movie Season and Beyond

It looks like one of the best summer movie seasons in recent memory...fuck it, EVER...is almost done. Yes, we've still got the Mummy 3, X-Files and the typical plethora of August comedies, but to me the season is over. This year was pretty much all build up for the Dark Knight anyway.

This summer began with what will probably be recognized as one of the best movies of this season that didn't have Batman in it. That would be, naturally, Iron Man. With Robert Downey Jr. being pretty much fucking perfect for this role, it was of no suprise that this film was really good. Throw in some Jeff "The Dude" Bridges and Nick "Sam Jackson" Fury and its even radder. Probably the surprise of the summer eventhough it always looked promising. I'm honestly still shocked it didn't really dissapoint.
Hopefully we'll be seeing a sequel with Favreau coming back to direct.

Speed Racer, the much-maligned Wachoswski Bros. movie, was the second movie out of the gate and while everyone seemed to hate it, I actually enjoyed it a lot. Although I guess that happened because I knew what to expect and that was a crazy kinetic throwback to a shitty cartoon show. It was funny when Billy and I exited the theatre and began to complain about it and we slowly realized that everything we complained about was the shit from the cartoon show that pissed us off to begin with.
I'd call this as retardely faithful to fault but hey, it was pretty cool that the entire movie was peretually in motion.

Chronicles of Narnia 2...what the fuck ever...

Indiana Jones IV was another wonderful treat for me but thats because I didn't have this heavenly view of a rather by-the-book adventure series. I think all of those crazy Indy fans that went into this movie wanted something completly different from even the original movies. Yes, Shia swinging with the monkeys was unneccesary, but it fits perfectly in line with the series as a somewhat ridiculous fun adventure playing on old 40s' serials. The trademark Indy wit was there but it still doesn't hold a candle to Raiders. However, I would say it compares nicely with the likes of the Last Crusade.
Regardless, it was a fun time in the theatre. End of story.

The Incredible Hulk was probably one of the few superhero movies this year that seemed to harken back to the old ways of the genre. That is, the extremely predictable revealed-in-the-trailer bullshit that passed us in recent years. That being said, it was probably the best Hulk movie possible. He's a very limiting character especially when he kind of has to be a hero. I hope when the inevitable Avengers movie gets here, they go the Ultimates route and use the Hulk as a villain in the first half. Fuck, just make the first volume of the Ultimates as the movie, that shit was tight. Mark Millar's hot as shit these days anyway. Let's get that muthafucka reap the benefits of seeing his fantastic Ultimates story on the big screen while making his proposed Superman trilogy.
Regardless, I really hope Tim Blake Nelson comes back as Leader at some point...

Speaking of Mark Millar, Wanted was probably one of the most ridiculous bombastic over-the-top-violent films I have ever seen. Thus, it was awesome. And Morgan Freeman totally said "motherfuckers."
This movie, in a small way, made me extremely pumped for the Watchmen next year as I remember the buzz for Wanted's original comic release was "Its like the Watchmen for super villains!"
By the way, the original comic series was about super villains, not assassins. Imagine how much cooler that would have been.

I still have yet to see Wall-E. I have a beautiful girlfriend and I promised to wait for her.
Shit, I feel like some little kid waiting for Miss Right so he can lose his virginity already...except Wall-E might be better than sex from what I've heard about it.

Hancockless. Hancocksuck. Hancock-shouldn't-have-been-heavily-edited. I am eagerly awaiting the hopeful DVD release of Hancock - the R-rated version.

Hellboy II is the next best competitor for the "Best Summer Movie Without Batman" for a damn good reason. One, its got the best artistic direction courtesy of Guillermo del Toro. Two, Its got better laughs than most of the comedies I've seen this year (except Forgetting Sarah Marshall, which was the best comedy of the first half by far). Three, Ron Perlman is probably the greatest B-movie actor this side of Bruce Campbell. How awesome would it be if Bruce Campbell showed up in del Toro's rumored third Hellboy with all the Universal monsters?
Anyway, awesome characterization, especially in Abe Sapien's direction, and a stellar addition in Seth MacFarlane's Johann Krauss. Also, be prepared to be amazed by the spectacle of all of the creatures. They really look fantastic.

And now...I'm getting to the ultimate. The Dark Knight. I seriously consider this movie to be the greatest movie I have ever been privy to. Everything about this movie, with the exception of a few nitpicky details, was fucking pitch perfect. Heath Ledger, Gary Oldman, Aaron Eckhart, Christian Bale, Morgan Freeman, and Michael Caine all give spectacular performances with whatever they are given. As much credit as Ledger's been getting (and he deserves it), I feel the need to comment more on the brillance of Oldman's Jim Gordon and Eckhart's Harvey Dent. I've heard the term "disappear into a role" said about this movie and its actors and I think one of the most understated disappearances are Oldman's and Eckhart's.
But whatever, this movie is fucking spectacular. Go and break as many records as you want, Dark Knight, I'll still throw my money at you.
And if this movie isn't nominated for Best Picture, Best Director and Best Supporting Actor, than the Academy is no longer worth my time. It doesn't have to win, but it really should be nominated.
Fucking A, Chicago won Best Picture. Like for real, what the fuck?

Anyway, Top 5 Movies of the Halfish-Year (For Me)

1. The Dark Knight
2. Hellboy II
3. Iron Man
4. Forgetting Sarah Marshall
5. Wanted

Best Movie I Haven't Seen: Wall-E
Honorable Mentions: Indy IV, Cloverfield

As far as the rest of the summer...

X-Files: I Want to Believe (July 25th) - I wish I was completly invested in the X-Files mythos so I could be really excited for the new movie, but alas, I have only seen a few episodes here and there. I completly respect the series though. David Duchovny rules.

Step Brothers (July 25th) looks funny but I don't like Will Ferrel. However, John C. Reilly is amazing...so that might make up for it.

Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (August 1st) reveals to me how much this series is pretty much Indiana Jones+Mummies.

Pants 2 (August 6th) = Funnay!

Pineapple Express (August 8th) - I made a bold prediction when I first heard about this movie. I said it would be the funniest movie of the summer. The Superbad of 2008...except, ya know, not overrated. I am sorry to say I might have made an error. In the fiercest comedic competition since 40-Year Old Virgin/Wedding Crashers '05, We have Pineapple Express and...

Tropic Thunder (August 13th) - Like fucking seriously, I am proud to be a comedy lover for that week.

Star Wars: The Clone Wars (August 15th) - I would be remiss if I didn't mention this movie but, in all honesty, I don't care too much. It'll probably be cool but I would much rather this be a direct-to-DVD. Although, on that note, can we go back in time and put Batman Beyond: Return of the Joker in the theatres? Fucking great movie.

The Rocker (August 20th) - The fuckers who are distributing this movie are off their rockers (HAHA!) Why did they movie it to this date, within a week and a half after two comedies with much better buzz? I got to see Rainn Wilson at the Transformers 2 shoot and the fucker is hysterical, but this just sucks that his potential breakout movie is getting shit on.

Hamlet 2 (August 22nd) - As a veteran of high school theatre, this intrigues me a little.

And that's the summer (at least for my interests).

Some choice picks for the forseeable future.

September 08 - Eagle Eye, Choke
October 08 - Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist, Zack & Miri Make a Porno
November 08 - Quantum of Solace, Harry Potter 6
December 08 - The Spirit

And my early predictions for top "summer movies" of 2009 - Watchmen, Star Trek, Transformers 2, G.I. Joe

And for the record, my top movie of Summer 2007 was Live Free or Die Hard.

College Blows, Disney World and Iron Man

So the Pokémon Mystery Dungeon review I am working on at NWR is going to be pretty funny. I shall post a link for all to see when it hits.
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I am so done with college this year. It will be fantastic when I can go home and stay there. I generally like my house and get along with my parents so that's rather cool. Also, my darling little baby niece is down there and I like seeing her...and I go through withdrawl when I am at school.
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Count til End of Semester: 4 Papers (Due 5/6, 5/7, 5/8, 5/14), 3 Exams (5/8, 5/12, 5/14) and 1 Take Home Final (Due 5/9).
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I leave for Disney World on May 16th. It's going to be so rad. While I know Disney might not be the uber wonderful conglomerate that was shown to me in my youth, I can't help but get excited to go to Disney World because, well, I can admit to having the maturity level of a 10-year old kid in some aspects. Anyone that has seen me geek out about anything or wax philsophy about the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles can attest to this.
Also, Indiana Jones 4 comes out while I am down there and I really hope something cool happens for it.
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Speaking of summer movies, the season just began last week with Iron Man.
Iron Man was very good but I am no longer going to revel in my hyperbole that was shot to shit with Spider-Man 3 last year.
Summer movie hyperbole is probably the biggest overblown crap in the world. How many mediocre movies have been seen through rose-colored glasses because they had a midnight release and some nostalgia behind them? Pretty much all of them (except Batman Begins, Spider-Man 2, X2 and...umm....I might be missing one).

Regardless of my view on the level of hyperbole during the summer movie season, Iron Man was a damn fine film. While actual action may have been sparse, the movie was well-developed, had a solid cast and Robert Downey Jr. was phenomenal as Tony Stark. I will use hyperbole with RDJ because he really was that good in the movie. He was the heart and soul of the movie and he delivered. I'll see how everything shakes out, but I think this might be the missing movie I refered to above.

To answer everyone's questions (bear with me and pretend like I have a regular readership that cares), I will still be at every midnight movie that I can make it to and, more specifically, who the hell will be around Wayne, NJ next weekend and wants to see Speed Racer?

Schloarly Article on the works of Pauly Shore: Firsties

Note to self: Write scholarly article about the works of Pauly Shore and how he is a Shakespearean tragic hero.
Other note to self: You wrote this completely sober.